Thursday, November 09, 2006

Are you Cool?

Grrl Genius just made a post I love. It's about letting go of your Perfectionism. Specifically in this one, I focussed on the Coolness Perfectionism.

My comment to her basically said that as mom of a preteen, I will now be automatically denied any rights to coolness by my very existence, so I might as well embrace my inner geek and enjoy myself with my uncoolness. I've never actually BEEN "cool," but my perfectionist tendencies have internally berated me with this failure every minute of every day for so long it has now become ingrained. I am in a constant state of comparison with everyone I see, invariably to my detriment.

But what IS "Cool?" Is it the wearing of current fashion? Or is the totally unselfconscious grabbing of whatever is clean and just going with it? Is it the most expensive haircut, spending an hour applying makeup every day? Or is it a shrug and a ponytail & lipgloss? We've been trained by the media to think that poses and pouts are what makes cool.

The people I envy the most are the ones who are comfortable in their own skin. Who don't feel the need to follow every trend, chasing the cool factor. People who wear what they wear for the fun and function, not in a desperate attempt to fit in. People who talk because they have something to say, not just to make noise. People who laugh at their mistakes, shrug, and move on, instead of freezing in the total horror of a misstep. THIS is what I think is "Cool."

I know a lot of "Cool" people. I'm not one of them. But this different "cool factor" is something to strive for. So, are YOU cool? mk