Wednesday, October 17, 2007


When I went to Women of Faith in July, Anita Renfroe was the guest comedienne. I'd seen her before, and she's really great. This year, she performed her piece called "Momsense," which is now taking the Internet by storm. If you have not seen this, you really need to. mk

And for those who really love it (and are wondering what the heck some of that stuff is she's saying), here are the lyrics.

Get up now
Get up now
Get up out of bed
Wash your face, brush your teeth, comb your sleepy head
Here's your clothes and your shoes, hear the words I said
Get up now, get up and make your bed

Are you hot?
Are you cold?
Are you wearing that?
Where's your books and your lunch and your homework at?
Grab your coat and your gloves and your scarf and hat
Don't forget you gotta feed the cat

Eat your breakfast, the experts tell us it's the most important meal of all
Take your vitamins so you will grow up one day to be big and tall
Please remember the orthodontist will be seeing you at three today
Don't forget your piano lesson is this afternoon so you must play

Don't shovel, chew slowly, but hurry, the bus is here
Be careful, come back here, did you wash behind your ears?

Play outside, don't play rough, would you just play fair?
Be polite, make a friend, don't forget to share
Work it out, wait your turn, never take a dare
Get along, don't make me come down there

Clean your room, fold your clothes, put your stuff away
Make your bed, do it now, do we have all day?
Were you born in a barn?
Would you like some hay?
Can you even hear a word I say?

Answer the phone, get off the phone
Don't sit so close, turn it down
No texting at the table
No more computer time tonight
Your iPod's my iPod if you don't listen up

Where you going and with whom and what time do you think you're coming home?
Saying thank you, please, excuse me
Makes you welcome everywhere you roam
You'll appreciate my wisdom someday when you're older and you're grown
Can't wait 'til you have a couple little children of your own

You'll thank me for the counsel I gave you so willingly
But right now I'll thank you NOT to roll your eyes at me

Close your mouth when you chew would appreciate
Take a bite maybe two of the stuff you hate
Use your fork, do not burp or I'll set you straight
Eat the food I put upon your plate

Get an A, get the door, don't get smart with me
Get a grip, get in here or I'll count to 3
Get a job, get a life, get a PhD
Get a dose of reality

I don't care who started it
You're grounded until you're 36

Get your story straight
And tell the truth for once for heaven's sake
And if all your friends jumped off a cliff
Would you jump too?

If I've said it once, I've said at least a thousand times before, that
You're too old to act this way
It must be your father's DNA

Look at me when I am talking
Stand up straight or when you walk
A place for everything
And everything must be in place
Stop crying or I'll give you something real to cry about

Brush your teeth, wash your face, get your PJs on
Get in bed, get a hug, say a prayer with Mom
Don't forget
I love you
And tomorrow we will do this all again because a mom's work never ends

You don't need the reason why
I said so I said so I said so I said so
I'm the Mom
The mom The mom The mom
The mom


The Beast Mom said...

I'm telling you...we are on some freaky wavelength! I just saw your comment and came to see YOUR post on this crazy-funny mommy. :) My sister is going to see her soon in "concert". That would be a fun mom outing...


Anonymous said...

Hi...I've been randomly following you writings for the past few months. Just read the part about your 'real name' your friends/family call you markira?

markira said...

BM, we *are* on a freaky wavelength, aren't we? How cool is that? Let me know how your sister likes Anita.

Anonymous, thanks for semi-delurking. ;) No, my "in real life" friends/family call me by my real first would be too confusing with the kids being named Mark and Kira to have me being called markira. Plus I would have to train everyone to do it and we'd have the people who refuse to go along, etc....too much bother. So I just use it online. mk

Anonymous said...

Okay, I get it...thanks. Also, sorry about the 'lurking' around thing; I thought that it was cool to just be a 'dedicated reader'..!

I am totally new to this blogging concept. If you'd like, I'll tell you how I came to find yours...

markira said...

Oh no, lurking is fine! It's just wonderful when a dedicated reader introduces themselves. (Plus, I love comments.) :D

I would love to know how you found yourself here.

Have you a name, or shall we call you Anonymous for always? ;) mk

Anonymous said...

Many moons ago....I was searching the web for something different to throw all my pocket change into. Something more interesting than just a jar or can. Google came up with your earlier posting, about all the loose change your parents had found lying around their house. (Great story!) And, once I started reading your entries.....well, I was 'hooked'.

What has been most interesting (to me) has been your writings on living/dealing with depression & bi-polar issues.

Mr. B

markira said...

Mr. B,

Pleased to "meet" you. I'm glad you liked my parents' "spare change" still blows me away how much money they had just lying around in coins!

Good to know that my writings on depression & borderline personality are reaching people. I was afraid that was just my own rambling and I was boring or senseless. (or boring others senseless, lol) mk

Anonymous said...

No, I didn't think those posts were senseless...and never boring...!

In your writings, you seem to come across (to me)as a happy person. How do you manage to stay upbeat if/when you have a really "down" day?

Will be watching for those Halloween photos...

Mr. B